Testo Soul Searchin'

Soul searching
Days like this I wish I didn't get phone service
Self-destruct is in times it seems like it's on purpose
My biggest fear is going through life with the wrong person
Question it, is it all worth it?
When you think of death, do you get all nervous?
I spend my life tryna shine through them drown curtains
Tucking on my problems, pretending like it was all perfect Then love yourz hit me
The grass is always greener, I need to cherish who with me
Complicated love it feel like Bobby next to Whitney
I need someone in the spot like just so I know that they get me
I wish she was she lost my confidence
I never turned her faith, I always moved on off commonsense
I let my happiness only stem from accomplishments and now I'm falling off so I'm suffering from the consequences
The more I'm speaking positive, the less they listen
And the more that I'm evolving, they just reminiscing
And the more I get rejected, then the less I do
I lost my love for this shit, and I blame you

And I'm soul searching
Soul searching, soul searching oh no no
Soul searching, soul searching, soul searching
Yo, I'm digging deeper than I ever did
Momma wasn't sure about me, glad she let me live
Imagine what would happend if she never did
A lot of people in positions and I let them in
I think about my fears how they are still in me
What's real for you is never real for me
What you do in 20 years, I do it in a week
And what I always hope to be, I already achieved
But now these people questioning my skills
I'm questioning myself 'cause they ain't copping what I sell
I'm reaching out for help, but don't nobody got the answers
I'm begging for a change, [?]
I'm going through the motions 'cause I'm paying all the bills
I got it in the moment, so I might as well just chill
But that ain't never been me, it's a frenzy in my mind
Will I see the other side? Maybe only time will tell